As a midlife and lifestyle blogger, as well as a life coach, I am often asked:
“Where should I be in my life at this point?” “Where Do I Fit In?”
Then over the weekend, I saw something on Facebook that added more inspiration to answering this question here on the blog.
It was a clip of Sally Field on The View promoting her new movie, Hello, my name is Doris.
I loved what she said about how we are always “coming of age”.
I remember seeing Sally Field for the first time in Smoky and The Bandit when I was just a kid.
Sally played Carrie, a runaway bride.
She has always played inspired, interesting roles that show the true diversity of women.
Today she is still inspiring women.
Midlife Women Are Amazing!
No matter our age, we are always reinventing ourselves.
We never “know it all” although the older we get the more collective knowledge and experience we have.
During midlife, we are in a unique place to share, shape and influence multiple generations.
We have young adult or adult kids, we have grandkids, significant others, parents, siblings, and friends.
Yet, still, many of us struggle for our own identity!
Sometimes we can lose ourselves in the lives of those around us.
We are caretakers, collaborators, spouses, friends, mothers, daughters, and coworkers.
Some women are having children later in life.
I know a few women in their 40’s just starting their families.
We are finding ourselves in many different situations needing to shift, change, and accommodate others.
If there is one thing I must tell myself, daily, and tell my friends and clients, it is to keep pushing yourself!
Never stop being who you are at any given moment.
Do not hold back on your own needs, thoughts, or feelings.
Don’t forget yourself!
Living through intention can help but first, we need to identify that we deserve to place focus on ourselves.
How Midlife Women Can Embrace Every Stage To Come:
We need to understand that it is perfectly normal and okay to change.
Change is frightening for many of us.
Acceptance of others is often sought after.
One thing I have found interesting having raised children is that in the teen years is when we most desire to be accepted.
Yet, some teens, who feel they are not accepted go out of their way to be different.
Sometimes in how they dress, others in how they act, or some in how they relate to their peers.
There are many ways I have seen teens set themselves apart proclaiming their individuality.
Then we hit our twenties and we mostly move out of that stage.
We come to accept who we are and are more comfortable with the fact that we like tattoos, or that we desire a certain career.
In our thirties we are either chasing our career goals, raising families, running kids to little league, or whatever we have established for ourselves.
Then we hit midlife and find ourselves empty nesters, or have kids moving back home!
As midlife women, we are always evolving, moving toward that next stage.
Carrying with us the hard hits, life lessons, and knowledge we have gathered along the way.
Maybe you have seen on social media women proudly proclaiming their stretch marks as beautifully earned stripes.
I agree and am not ashamed of my stretch marks from bearing my children.
Yet we need more focus on those emotional stretch marks we have earned!
Every stage of life bears with it both extreme joys and extreme hardships.
Each joy is earned! Every hardship teaches us something important.
Either something we can use to help ourselves evolve, or help someone else evolve from.
I agree with what Sally said in the clip above, “what’s there for us that we could not have known if we had not gone through all of those other horrible stages”?
At first when I heard her say “horrible stages” I flinched just a little because I was not sure if I agreed that my stages had been horrible.
Upon reflection, there were many times in each stage of my life that horrible things happened to me.
That does not mean the entire stage was horrible, but certainly, each stage brought forth an onslaught of horrendous events here and there.
I am not sure we need to “fit in”.
We should embrace and enjoy the differences in the human species.
First, we have to accept our own differences from others.
The fact is, midlife women “fit in” anywhere and in any way we darn well please!
We have time to keep growing and learning but we have collected a lot of wisdom and experience along the way.
Midlife is the best time of life!
We need to self-identify so that we can have a base understanding of who we are at any given stage of life.
Setting up goals for what we want to move into toward the next stage is also a great plan.
That is why I am going to set an intention for myself which I will take action on.
This coming weekend I will make a vision board.
The board will have who I am right now and where I want to go.
My plans for ME in the next coming stage of my life.
Knowing who or where I am right now will help me reach the goals I have for myself in the next stage.
So this is a two-part vision board:
Where and who I am in the present.
What and who I want to become in the next stage of my life.
I will share my vision board with you in the coming week or two.
A Midlife Women’s Call To Action:
I want to encourage you to do the same.
It would be wonderful if you created your own vision board!
I think this is a wonderful time of the year to do it.
Setting our goals for the coming year, working on self-awareness and paying homage to how far we have come.