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So many people hold themselves back and are standing in the way of their own otherwise direct path to happiness. Fear is usually what stops them and keeps them standing dead in their tracks. Today’s article focuses on how to get out of your own way and find the happiness you deserve.

Get Out Of Your Own Way


There are many things that can create the scenarios in which we get in our own way.

I will go through a few of them with you.

See if you recognize any of these blocking conditions within yourself and learn how to get out of your own way!

How And Why We Get In Our Own Way:

Fear Of Success:

As if we do not have enough of a battle having control of our own lives we often put our own roadblocks up in front of ourselves.

We sometimes fear the idea of success and being happy.

I know that sounds almost impossible but it’s sadly quite true.

There is always someone in our lives that we are trying to accommodate, please, or impress.

We worry too much about what other’s will think or feel so we hold ourselves back for illogical reasons.

It could be that we worry about not having enough time with our kids.

Perhaps you do not want to go against a friends advice.

Other’s worry about the fall out that may happen if they move forward.

Worry About The Children:

When kids are concerned, just stop making excuses.

Kids need to see what a happy parent looks like!

Yes, I know the power struggles between parents.

The damage can be very real.

Yet, many times you are also adding to the damage of the kids by allowing yourself to be put in a corner.

Children are easily manipulated by devious exes.

They may not see the truth now, but years to come, when they are wiser, they will.

Live for the future of that child.

That child’s future intellect, where they will look back and know who the real culprit was!

By allowing an ex to bully you now, you are teaching your own children to be weak and to be bullied!

Be strong, stand tall, and take the life you deserve to have.

Worry About Finances:

When it comes to finances, for me, it’s simple…

Having nice things cannot equate to true happiness.

Now, this goes within reason of course.

We need food, medical care, and other basic things to survive.

Yet if the financial aspect of your fears means living in a small ordinary home versus a home in the nicer neighborhood, let it go!

I would much rather be happy living in a cheap place than miserable in a mansion.

Granted I do not always agree with the idea that money can’t buy happiness.

I do enjoy the benefits of having money.

Everyone does!

Yet if fear of losing money for the extra things in life has you in a holding pattern and you are miserable, those things don’t matter at all.

Get Out Of Your Own Way Image That Reads: Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that looks good on the outside.

Losing Something Of Value:

Being in my midlife I have seen many of my friends go through a divorce.

The fear of losing something of value comes up often in divorce.

Yet, this can come up in other ways too.

Maybe you loaned a friend your golf clubs.

Perhaps the idea of losing the friendship itself scares you.

Remember, items can be replaced, your dignity can not.

There is no value in anything you own if you as a person are not whole.

We all need to focus on building our lives in a way that give us substance.

My advice if you relate to any of the above is to get out of your own way and take a firm grasp of your self-control.

People may try to hold us back from our happiness.

Some may do everything in their power to keep us from moving forward in our lives.

Sadly, there are vindictive, callous, even evil people in the world.

Some which we have had direct contact with, perhaps have even been married to, or are best friends with.

The more they see you succeed the more they will try to control you and keep you from your happiness.

Get Out Of Your Own Way And Stop Making Excuses:

I have heard too many times from divorced people that they have to react to their exes.

No, you do not!

Unless you are actually in the middle of the divorce and are fighting over parenting time or support, it’s over!

When you continue to behave childishly and argue with your ex that sends one very clear signal…

You are not over your ex!

There is a reason why court documents about visitation and support exist.

Once they are in place there truly is nothing left to argue over.

If you do not agree with what is documented, go back to court.

When dealing with a friend who pours negativity into your life, end the friendship.

More often than not your so-called friend is simply jealous of your inner strength so they attempt to stifle it.

Get Out Of Your Own Way And Love Your Life Path:

To truly have control over your own life, and be a happy person you need to stop being worried about what everyone else is thinking and doing.

We all make mistakes and from those mistakes, we learn and grow.

The only true mistakes are those we fail to learn from.

I have made a multitude of mistakes in my life and I do not regret any of them because from each of them I took away something of value.

To this day I make mistakes, both large and small.

Almost daily I make a small mistake of some kind.

Being consumed with the other person and attempting to impress something upon them only holds yourself back.

Unto each their own!

Let that person do their own thing even if that thing is trying to manipulate or change you.

Smile and wish them good luck then get back on your true path!

By getting out of our own way and allowing ourselves to walk our own truest path is the only way we will ever truly find our happiness.

See more articles on Empowerment.

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1 Comment

  1. August 3, 2018 / 2:23 pm

    Great article, Joely! You are so right, I especially love your words of wisdom about money & what really matters in terms of happiness. You said it perfectly; you’d “Much rather be happy living in a cheap place than be miserable living in a mansion” – words to live by for sure! Thanks for sharing this.
    Love & Biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

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